MY PERSONAL NO.1

What I really don’t want to hear? ”I told you so”. Mummy would not say those four words out loud, because well, she doesn’t need to. My conscience is loud enough. Growing up, it took me a few ‘I told you so’s’ to realize that though my parents advice may not always tally with exactly what I want, am better of taking it anyway.

The people we look up to contribute a great deal to the kind of persons we turn out to be. I cannot say that I have made all the best decisions since deciding to follow up in the footsteps of mummy, but I can say that I haven’t had any regrets so far. Her opinions always matter. They help me to close the deal in the decision making process. As an adult, I know she’s had a lot of experience in life. She knows best. She’s not perfect, she definitely made some mistakes in the past. The great thing about that is, she wouldn’t want me to repeat them; makes life a bit easier to deal with. At times when I have not lived up to her expectations, am more encouraged to do better, because I know she believes in me.

Mummy has a big heart. Taking me in and caring for me like a mother would despite the inconveniences, not everyone would do that. She’s the strongest person I know. Am yet to see mummy break under pressure in a difficult time; not when the ER is like her second home. Very passionate about her job, dedicated to making sure that baby survives. A mother of two awesome kids, a wife and a surgeon…how you juggle all of that together? well, you’re just great at it.

Today, you graduated as a consultant pediatric surgeon and top of your class. The whole family is very proud of you. You deserved it and you earned it. You are smart!!! We bless God for what he has done for you. Like daddy and I always say; you’re almost always right! And you deserve the very best. Congrats!

Dr. Mrs. Ambe Nana Esi Obbeng, I dedicate this to you!

We Love You!

We Love You!

NO SMOKING. NO ALCOHOL. NO DRUGS.

Something has got to kill a man. Smoking,  drinking alcohol or using drugs cannot and will not kill you unless you decide otherwise. There are many ways a person can commit suicide. To me, these three form a part of them; smoking, drinking alcohol and doing drugs. Most people start out as passive or occasional ASDs, for the purpose of this post, ASDs refer to people who take alcohol, smoke or do drugs, before getting addicted to them over time. The world and life is such that humans are bound to be sad or happy at one time or the other. Using any of the above to get over sadness or just to contain happiness is a sure route to addiction, because you are not going to get happy or sad just once or twice in your lifetime. And that is where the suicide comes in. if rehab does not save you, death will not escape you either.

My dad died from a liver problem caused by alcohol and smoking. I wish my dad was still alive. I miss him a whole lot. I witnessed what he had to go through before finally giving up the fight and I vowed not to touch any of the two, drugs included. We have heard the stories and cautions countless times. It’s no use repeating them. I am an ardent advocate of the happy life cause, live life to the fullest. Do what makes you happy, but live reasonably. For whatever reason that you might be an ASD, it’s not worth it. You do not have to depend on them to be happy. How well you deal with life’s challenges makes you who you are, strong or weak. The above make you weak, not strong. An indication that you’re not strong enough to face the problem at hand so you cover it up with booze or get high on some weed or coke. That problem is your reality. You are going to have to deal with it one way or the other, not cover it up or push it aside. If you’re happy, give thanks and give back. Don’t cut your happiness short with a long term fatal illness that you could have avoided. Yeah sure, once in a while you want to hang out with your boys or girls and just have fun, no big deal there. But watch your habits before they become your character, says the wise. The thing about death is that when you die, you’re gone. You have no business with the rest of the living. It is those whom you leave behind that suffer the most. Those who have to deal with the pain of losing you. Those whose love for you creates a void in their hearts. Think about them before you decide to mess your life up. The life you live today affects your generation and the one you’re going to help create. Your kids are going to look up to you, they could end up worse than you did, but do not let it be because at some point, they decided to follow in your footsteps. Do not let them learn the facts the hard way, like I did. Someday I hope to have the chance to share exciting experiences with my kids and grandkids. They will include the good and the bad and the lessons learnt. I would teach them to live life as best as they can. To not be afraid of making mistakes, to be strong and wise, and to be happy. The story of how I lost my dad, I will not leave out. To my kids, I would say GOD FIRST, NO ALCOHOL. NO SMOKING. NO DRUGS.

If you would lock all your doors securely to ensure your safety, if you would look twice or thrice before crossing the road to avoid an accident, think hard about the choice you’re making to become an ASD. Your Life Is Involved.

JUST……LOVE!

Queenly 20140428_190011

RULES! RULES! RULES!!!!!!………………At this point, she’s over breaking the rules. She figures that he’s just not worth it or not man enough to show that he is. Even though she’s very much into him, she’s got to let go….it’s not pride, it’s called self-respect.

The hardest thing about falling in love is not being completely sure of the other person’s feelings. You don’t say you love a person until you know for sure that you really do. Until you’ve seen and experienced the shitty side of the other person and still don’t want to let go. Until you get to the point where looks don’t count .Until you value the other person more than yourself. Until you’re ready to go all out for the person, regardless of circumstance……when she does all of that, dude, don’t get it twisted, that girl loves you. When she’s doing all of that and you’re not giving anything in return, that’s selfish. And dude, she’s going to get tired along the line, and give it a break. She’s going to let go and someone else is going to come around and appreciate what you didn’t.

Truth is, no matter how many times you’ve been hurt, you’re going to have to let go of the past and be ready to trust again or remain single. When you feel something for a person, you’ve got to do more than just say, you’ve got to show it …. Actions do speak louder than words. Put in some effort, trust in your feelings. If it doesn’t work out, well, at least you tried. You gain some experience also. But don’t let an opportunity pass you by because of your ego or some heartbreak or fear of denial. Again, that’s just selfish. Forget about the rules, they are meant to be broken anyway. Rules do not determine whom you fall in love with, your heart does. So follow your heart and let your brain decide. Don’t take her show of affection for granted, you can do more than just ignore. If you love her, treat her right. You’ve got a brain, you can tell when she loves you back, trust in your instincts. When you’re sure that she does … don’t hold back. You’ve got everything to gain and nothing to lose …. No Regrets, Just Lessons.

**To all the ladies: You’re pretty enough to not be treated as second best. You’re your own kind of beautiful and a princess in your own right!**

** To the guys: don’t take a good woman for granted.**

PEACE OUT! LOVE HARD!!!!

WHAT FRIENDSHIP MEANS TO ME.

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And that.Is my idea of what friendship should be like, basically.Friends are a very necessary part of our lifes. They are the family that we get to choose. Yes, you don’t let your friends choose you, you choose them. Letting someone choose you as a friend is peer pressure, not friendship.  Its very true that your friends pretty much show the kind of person you are. We click with people on different levels.  Some we constantly love to hang out with, some we secretly admire, and others..we simply just don’t connect with, so we ‘ignore’. Amongs all these group of people,  we form a bond of friendship . I like to describe it as ‘the unspoken bond’. The kind of bond where deep down, we know that no matter what, we can count on the people we share it with. That is friendship. It is being there for the other person when they need you most. It is setting aside your differences and misunderstandings just to be there for them. Not because you have to, but because you want to. That ‘want’ comes from ‘caring’ and caring, from ‘love’. It is where you learn to put the other persons feelings first. In friendship, there’s no selfishness. There’s no greed. There’s no jealousy. Only love. When we value the other person enough to not want to hurt them, even unintentionally. … When we are willing to forgive all wrongs and to trust even in deceit. …That is love. Friendship is formed from love. I am grateful to God for the people I can call friends. The true ones and the conditional ones. The quality of friendship, lies in how true you are to the other person.  Know who your real friends are…value them. Know who your conditional friends are…love them. Your friends can make or unmake you.
Your power lies only in being able to
choose them wisely.
               From the fault in our stars, a novel by John Green:” you don’t get to choose whether or not you get hurt in life, but you do have some say in who does.
    
   To my friends: I like my choices, I hope you like yours”.
     

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TO LOVE♥♥ TO FRIENDSHIP♥♥
                          **Let Love Lead***

         
#count on me, Bruno Mars.
                        ♥♥♥

Take Time To Smell The Roses.

Life…is a journey. Each one with his own path.Destination, is most often unknown. None of us have the same or a specific map, because we are all different, with different circumstances. Some people are slow goers..they prefer to trek, others are ‘no time wasters’..they would rather use a train or plane. Another group, not really mindful of pace or time..are comfortable in a car or bus . One thing that all humans have in common is that we are born and we will definitely die someday. Knowing this, I believe that people should take time to understand each other. Never be in a haste to conclude anything about anyone. Rather, take time to love. Love comes from understanding , respect and appreciation. Being all judgemental about people and things takes away the beauty from your eyes. Because instead of seeing the good, you’re always on the look out for the bad. Have you noticed how people who are so judgmental about everything seem to be the most boring and annoying people you have to put up with?…Life is not a race.People are bound to make mistakes. It doesn’t make them who they are. I might be angry to day..but I might be smiling in the next minute..because am human! So I say..appreciate people for who they are..with flaws as well as capabilities. Choose to have that kind of attitude today..and tolerance will no longer be a task for you.
         From Chris Brown’s don’t judge me **it can get ugly, before it gets beautiful**
***MY GOLDEN RULE:whatever makes you sad..leave it. Whatever that makes you happy. .keep it!***
Enjoy life. .its the creator’s gift to you.
           LOVE ALL, SERVE ALL..JUDGE NONE!

PEACE OUT!
                ♥♥♥

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Take time to smell the roses♥♥♥

Sharing Quote from Daily Inspiration

I want to share this quote from Daily Inspiration:

“The only person you should try to be better than is the person you were yesterday.”

Anonymous

If you frequently compare yourself with others, that comparison is not unusual; just not helpful. There will always be someone wealthier, more attractive, more successful, more talented, etc. Seeing yourself as someone who continually strives to become a better person with a goal to improve each day socially, emotionally, mentally and physically as a productive member of society creates a healthier individual. Time to stop comparing and start growing.
_________________________________

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“TEEN LOVE”

I live in the part of the world where having a boyfriend within the teen years is generally considered morally inappropriate. Ironically, the desire to be with the opposite sex is stronger around the teen age period. So I asked myself. .is it really wrong to have a boyfriend or is there more to it?…My cousin, whom I consider my parent, once told me that “I do not have a problem with you having a boyfriend now, but know that if you do go in for one, you risk getting pregnant and or broken hearted.”From that statement, I realised that what our parents sort to do was to protect us from the consequences of having a boyfriend. I do agree to that to some extent. As a growing teen, I have come to the realisation that falling in love as a teen could have terrible consequences. At that stage id like to rather consider the feelings towards the opposite sex as ‘infatuated’..or merely just ‘crushes’. So the possibility of getting heartbroken is really high. I also feel on the other hand, that, for some of us who want to live our lives to the fullest..these age restrictions prevent us from doing so. We don’t get to decide how long we get to live. Some don’t even make it past teenage. Why then should anyone decide for us when to do what? . In that world, if we feel the same way for each other, nothing should prevent us from enjoying being in each others company and being loved by that one person. ..after all, life is too short to risk doing what can be done today for tomorrow. So I narrowed it down to this..For some of us, the decision to remain single throughout the teen years of our lives is based more on consequence than moral conscience. Which means that I personally do not think that its wrong to date at that age..its just a choice to make. As with choices, the consequences must be faced. Am pretty sure though, that given different circumstances such us being born in the other part of the world, I may have decided differently on this issue. Our circumstances do count in the choices we make..but as much as possible, we shouldn’t let them influence the way we live our lives.
       TO A HAPPY LIFE!
**NO REGRETS. …JUST LESSONS! **
Peace out!
….To my imaginary followers, I hope you get real soon..lol.♥

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Sharing Quote from Daily Inspiration

I want to share this quote from Daily Inspiration:

“The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on your mother, the ecology, or the President. You realize that you control your own destiny.”

Albert Ellis – American psychologist, writer (1913-2007)

Wouldn’t it be great if all your years were your best years? We tend to remember our early years as the best. How much of your time do you spend complaining about others, the economy or the government? Once you can distinguish between your and other people’s problems, you have more time to solve your own problems. Useless issues arise when we try to solve other people’s problems rather than tackle our own. Create your own good years; find and solve your own problems. Along the way you can discover life’s golden nuggets; reach out to uplift others as a good steward.
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☆THE START OF A NEW DAY!☆

The start of a new day brings with it hope.No matter how bad you felt going to bed the night before, the start of the morning, the very moment you open your eyes should bring you a sense of hope and gratitude. Most of us think life in general sucks..well if you don’t, then good for you. Either ways I just want to say that am happy to be alive this morning. Am happy to see the beautiful face and hear the hungry voice of my baby boy (haha..my cousins son as a matter of  fact..*babysitting*).. who put me through three hours of hell on earth trying to get him to sleep. He did sleep and even though I slept late and woke up early, I feel great!..its going to be a long day today. I have no idea how am going to get through it, but I know I will.With four kids and the house to manage. .well thats something! (Got an older cousin helping me). I like to feel like superwoman whenever I go through challenging situations..which some will put us ‘problems’..cause I always manage to pull through. I know am strong and even stronger than I think. So am going to go through the day in my royal robe and cape, armour in hand, determination in heart and a successful SMILE on my face. You should too…yeah, SMILE cause you haven’t got all the problems in the world!
Peace out!

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*Mentally recite rule seven whenever you’re down or in a really bad mood*..I do and it helps.

**remember to keep the smile on…♥♥♥**